Thursday, October 28, 2010

Parent teacher interviews should be optional for the parents not just the teachers

I don't want to brag, and I'm not saying this because their my kids but every teacher said that they WISH they could have 26 of my son in their cla.... oh, sorry, I was channeling every annoying mother I ever wanted to smack who has had the chutzpah to say that line out loud.

Parent teacher interviews are never what I think they're going to be. I always expect the "talks too much" and "he could work harder" but it's the "he hasn't had the text book since September" and "he got 50% on his last four tests didn't he tell you?" that really blow me away. I accept complete responsibility for actually having the four kids in this day and age of technology but guess what? If my kid is looking up his Ninja name on his computer while he should be taking notes in class then DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT. I mean you could stand next to him and encourage him to listen or you could take away his computer all together or, here's a crazy idea, be interesting and capture his attention! The pattern I have found is great teacher = great interview, sour/miserable/hates their job teacher = bad interview. Those amazing teachers are life savers... as in they have saved me from killing my kids. The "he's very polite and respectful" gives me hope for the future.

The best part of the interview for me though, is embarrassing my kids. Last year I won a silver medal. After a ten minute interview with a math teacher I asked why he was talking about math when he was the science teacher. The teacher thought I was joking. Instead of going with it I persisted, "no really, isn't this science?" I can still see the color red of my kid's face.

Today, however, I won gold...
Me: Do you allow the kids to use computers in your class?
English teacher: Only when I do full frontal teaching
long pause
Me: Full frontal teaching?... there's a great joke in there....
longer pause
Teacher: Uh, it's a technical term, I'm an English teacher...
Me: Well, it sounds like you're teaching naked
Zack: Mommy stop talking
Teacher: Uh... stop visualizing!

Zack: Wow, we are so even now for when the teacher overheard me say I wanted a blow job!

Happily only half of my kids' teachers showed up today so I only had half of the aggravation. I can't wait for report cards.

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